Christmas, Childlessness & EFT

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 The Christmas period can be a difficult time for many people. For those dealing with involuntary childlessness, the relentless advertising in shops, online and in the media, can bring up a range of difficult emotions. The sense of loss and grief can be heightened, as it’s this time of year when many people are starting shopping for their children’s gifts and planning magical events. The emotions triggered at this time of year can be especially challenging for those also suffering with S.A.D, low mood and anxiety.

Luckily, the EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) can help deal with and heal issues related to this Christmas period.

So what is EFT?

EFT is a gentle meridian based therapy which, just like acupuncture, works on the meridian energy system in the body. Unlike acupuncture, there are no needles required. EFT therefore works by gently tapping on the various acupuncture points on the face, body and hands whilst focussing on the issue causing the discomfort or negative emotions. Gary Craig, the Founder of EFT states that “the cause of all negative emotion is a disruption in the body’s energy system”. This combination of tapping and saying relevant statements, therefore works to permanently release it from both the body and mind.

The tapping points:

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Getting started:

Before you start, rate the level of discomfort (of your feelings or the issues) out of 0-10. 10 being the highest imaginable and 0 being completely calm and relaxed.

The statements below can be used or amended in any way to suit your own feelings. These have been designed as generic statements so feel free to change any words which don’t relate fully to your situation. Once you start tapping, you may notice other thoughts come up. These can be used to add to your tapping script. The more ‘specific’ you can be about your thoughts and feelings, the better.

Repeating the statements below, use your first two fingers to gently tap each acupressure point between 5 to 7 times.

Tapping Statements:

(*Fill in the gap with statements that resonate with you)

“Even though I feel *_____________________, there is always a possibility of change and I deeply love and accept myself”.

  • I always struggle at this time of year.
  • I dread Christmas every year.
  • Christmas makes me feel sad and reminds me what is missing in my life.
  • Christmas is really stressful for me.
  • Christmas makes me feel sad that I will never have my own children.
  • I wish I didn’t have to engage in the Christmas activities.
  • I feel guilty that I don’t feel excited by Christmas.
  • I just feel like I’m getting through the Christmas period.
  • The worse thing about Christmas is _____________.
  • I don’t have my own family and children.
  • I feel like I am missing out on one of the most wonderful seasons.
  • I feel anxious about having to spend Christmas with my family and their children
  • I feel sad that I don’t get to go and watch my children in a school play.
  • I feel sad that I will never experience the excitement on my children’s faces on Christmas morning.
  • I wish I could feel excited and look forward to Christmas instead of dreading it.
  • I wish I had children of my own to buy for.
  • I used to love Christmas before I found out I couldn’t have children.
  • I feel sad that I lost my baby and I should be buying gifts.
  • I feel like I miss out because I don’t have children of my own.
  • Christmas is a lonely time for me.
  • I feel really lonely at Christmas
  • I wish I could go to sleep and it all be over.
  • I really miss __________.

Once you have competed a few rounds of tapping, rate the level of discomfort again. Repeat the EFT tapping process until you start to feel better and get a low number of 2 or 3.

Would you like more support?

Whilst this script is a great tool, EFT can have fantastic results when working with an EFT practitioner too.

If you would like more specific support in dealing with these feelings or any issues associated with dealing with childlessness, loss, grief, fears, emotional issues or phobias, please contact me for a FREE consultation over the phone or via Skype.

Kelly Da Silva

EFT/NLP Practitioner and Founder of The Dovecote.org

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